Leaving in the morning for Cincinnati for the wedding I've mentioned in some comments. I am thankful for recent posts (and the comments to those posts) on A Mom's Serious Blunder and on Her Big Sad for helping me prepare/gain strength for the trip...
Well, more specifically the onslaught of questions about Heather from concerned family members (Mom's side of the family - Mom was one of 11 kids so there are almost 40 of us cousins - it's one of my cousin's who is getting married).
I have practiced and prepared!
I love my extended family, but fact of the matter is, I love Heather most of all. She's doing great, I plan to leave it at that and direct the conversation back to them/their kids.
Also something that has really given me help in the preparation is ODAT - August 4th... Great page on EXPECTATIONS! Reminded me that I too don't always live up to other's expectations AND Heather doesn't have to live up to each of the family member's (or mine!) expectations either.
She's doing great!
Now what I won't tell them but I will write here - she told me tonight on the phone that today she "got rid of all her paraphernalia"... pause... I say "that's great"... she says... "except the bong... I'm not smoking pot, but I just can't throw it away, but I'm not sure how to sell it..." ummm....??? I let it go!!!
She also said that she is helping her one guy friend stay of Oxy (4 weeks now I think?), and that he too is no longer smoking pot and they are helping each other.
Just reporting here!
I won't be on the blogs - probably not at all the way this trip is working out - until next week when I get back. But I am bringing my prayer list so will continue praying for those on my blog list (and Carolyn & her daughter "H" - if you're reading this - you too!).
It is torture for us all…
4 days ago
Have a wonderful time! You can honestly say Heather is doing well and leave it at that. See you when you get back :)
ReplyDeleteI hope you have a fantastic time, you so deserve it! I love the way you let Heather share and stayed out of it, great job! Expectations are a set up for pain. I will miss you here in blogland, but glad you are getting away.
ReplyDeleteI hope that you can leaving it all behind and have a relaxing time. Enjoy the wedding and the gathering of family. Heather IS doing well. Hold her close to your heart and feel confident saying she is OK!
ReplyDeleteIt is funny how there are different levels of communication for different groups of people. Some can handle the talk of drug paraphernalia like you are talking about a sandwich. For the other group, things have to be censored and carefully tiptoed around. I sometimes make mistakes.
Have a wonderful trip.
xx kris
Have a safe and enjoyable trip and a great time!
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for your prayers. They have truly made all the difference in the world. I'm so glad to hear that Heather is doing well. I'll continue to pray that she finds what she needs to continue on her road to recovery. I hope you have a wonderful trip and can truly relax. You deserve it!
ReplyDeleteCarolyn
Happy trails and see you when you get back :)
ReplyDeleteI am not sure why but the part about the bong actually made me burst out laughing. I can totally see that to an addict that is quite a predicament. To them it is a piece of art...how can it be thrown away? LOL I am sure my son would say the same thing...only he doesn't smoke pot. I am not sure this is coming across the way I want it to but it made me chuckle and I wanted to share that with you.
ReplyDeleteHave a fabulous trip and I think your plan of "She's great!" and redirect is perfect. I really want to hear how that plan of action worked out when you get back. It will give me some confidence to try it next time.
Have a wonderful trip; you and Heather remain in my thoughts and my prayers!
ReplyDeleteYour post made me smile. I so get it. (Just reporting!)
ReplyDeleteHave a great trip. I'll see you on your return. Meanwhile, I'll keep you in my prayers. Hugs.
Welcome back!
ReplyDeleteHope your trip to Cinci went well and you were able to truly enjoy yourself. Peggy
ReplyDelete