I just received the new People Magazine (March 29, 2010) and read the article about actor Corey Haim's unexpected death at age 28, and there in the "box" on the 3rd page of the article was the O word:
OxyContin
The cause of his death is still undetermined, but the article mentioned that the California attorney general announced that an illegal prescription for OxyContin was filled. The public may never know the actual cause of death, nor is it any of our business, but the public does know that the actor struggled with addiction. My heart goes out to his mother, another parent dealing with this alternate reality.
Two lines in this article stood out to me. One was a quote from actor and friend of Haim's, Corey Feldman, "[Haim was] the greatest manipulator the world has ever known, as good addicts are". The second, "Some experts say that having a doting parent around can hinder beating addiction..."
Alternate reality.
I've read quite a few times and have been thinking quite a lot about "Dad's" recent Partnership article ("Dad" from An Addict in Our Son's Bedroom). The Partnership's Intervene article from March 15th, 2010 titled, "My Son's Addiction: What Is vs. What Ought to Be". If you are dealing with a son or daughter addicted to drugs and haven't yet read the article, I highly suggest you do. Unfortunately, and I really try not to, but often I find myself having pity parties - for myself and for my daughter. I can ask, "Why?" And these parties usually start with me thinking about "What ought to be", or from a similar angle, "What I envisioned for my life and my daughter's life and our relationship". Dad's article was so helpful in ARTICULATING what I feel is the core of what causes me pain as I stumble through my relationship with my daughter. If I could only keep myself in WHAT IS and throw WHAT OUGHT TO BE out the window, how much better things would be mentally for myself and for the relationship between my daughter and me.
Dad - I hope my interpretation of your article didn't slaughter what you intended, but my interpretation of what you wrote has been a great help to me in figuring out the source of my despair that sneaks up on me. Please comment and correct me for anyone else who reads this if I misinterpreted your words.
Thank God for people like "Dad" who have the intelligence and articulation to go out to the school and other places to speak and write articles to help others dealing with addiction - and PREVENTION. I love his recent talks at the school - hopefully nipping it in the bud BEFORE an addiction happens. To prevent even just ONE kid, would help a WHOLE family.
As far as OxyContin goes, I wish Purdue Pharma would put the genie back in the bottle, or at least figure out a way to successfully contain it.
My sympathies go out to Corey Haim's mother in her time of need.
God bless.
It is torture for us all…
4 days ago
Great blog post, lots here. Its very sad about Corey Haim, as it was with the other recent celebrity deaths and all the deaths we will never hear about. I still remember being very upset when Heath Ledger died, he was one of my favorite actors. The only good that can possibly come from the public hearing about these deaths is that MAYBE it will get through to potential addicts, current addicts, drug policy makers, and the pharmaceutical companies.
ReplyDeleteI agree about Dad, he's done a lot for many of us with his insight, honesty and communication skills (he paid me to say that).
I hope things change.
Im sorry that Corey Haim overdosed. i'm sorry for all the kids who kill themselves on drugs.
ReplyDeleteits no more purdue pharma's fault than it is smith and wesson if someone puts a gun barrel in their mouth.
oxycontin's were built and designed for one thing only. pain reduction in the terminally ill and grievously injured patients.
so are fentanyl patches. morphine is also used. Percocets and Percodan have been around for ages and ages.
heroin has been around since God invented the world. and abused that long.
I just can't see the rationality of blaming anyone but the addict. sorry.
these kids would have chosen some other drug even if Oxy's had never been marketed.
Thanks for sharing this and for the article. Have a good weekend!!
ReplyDeleteYou nailed it exactly. I would get so depressed and angry about my son and his future and our future and the who mess. Then I began to realize it was all about me going to what ought to have been instead of what is.
ReplyDeleteGoing there only hurt me so I I don't want to hurt I stay in the present no and when I want to think of brought things I think of what could be but stay grounded in what really is today and right now.
YOU GOT IT!!!! We all grow, I just grow slow you, seem to be shooting up faster than a teenage boy.
ps.: Thank you so much for your kind words.
ReplyDeleteI long for the day again when the Big "O" referred to something else. And it felt pretty good too. LOL
ReplyDeleteGreat post; and I agree with all the comments, especially Ron's last comment! LOL
ReplyDeleteI don't blame any company or any specific drug. And although I find myself frustrated with the lack of understanding and knowledge in the world around us about drugs and addiction, my son reminded me, just this week, that before his addiction, I was in complete denial about drugs and addiction (and he was right). It is one of those topics that without first-hand knowledge, you never learn about.
I do blame the pharmecutical companies for making drugs meant for terminally ill or severe chronic pain sufferers so readily available. Years ago, it was pretty tough to get your hands on Percocet. Something changed in the laws and doctors are over-prescribing legal herion. I do belive the addict has the majority of the responsiblity, but it is pretty easy to get hooked on something that a teen may not think is too dangerous. I know my son didn't think taking Vicoden would lead to a severe opiate addiction. It is just sad all the way around and I pray something changes in the medical world, maybe it would at least lesson some of the availablity?? RIP Corey Haim.
ReplyDeleteGreat post. Thanks for the link. It was also a great post. I recall reading on a blog recently that failing to accept what is (reality) is the very definition of insanity.
ReplyDelete