Status update

I talked to Heather on the phone 2 nights ago, I've been busy and haven't had a chance to write the update.

So far whenever I've brought up something regarding AA, treatment etc she has been receptive to what I've said - like, "Okay, I'll keep that in mind" type of responses.

The other night I said to her, "I'm only going to bring this up once, and then I'm not going to harp on it, but the next time you find yourself in severe pain, like you did with your hip last week, I'd just go to the ER, or an orthopedic surgeon. Get CAT scans, MRIs whatever, but be honest with them, and just get it over with to see what's wrong besides the things Chiropractic is helping." (Thanks for the comments on my last post!)

This time she did not seem receptive. She said that she had gone running and that caused the pain, that when she went to the chiropractor he said her vertebrae were out of alignment and when she ran they collapsed (this is as close as I can come to remembering exactly what she said). That he "fixed it" and she was fine. She went on to say, that she has more important things on her list to get done. She also said, she doesn't want to know if she has "temporal lobe damage" (what???).

I've said it ONCE, I'm not bringing it up again, it is hers to handle. BUT, it does tell me something that she's not as concerned about it as I was. Which, makes me wonder, if she KNOWS what's causing the pain and therefore knows she doesn't need to see a doctor or, well, I won't go on... I am not spending time worrying about it - I've said my thing.

Something that DOES concern me: Her ex-boyfriend.

Apparently the reason she left Orlando three months ago was to get away from her ex-boyfriend and stay hidden. She is sub-letting an apartment and having her mail etc go to her old address in Orlando. Heather said barely anyone has been to her apartment b/c she can't let anyone know where it is. She told of how when one friend brought another friend who hadn't been there before, when they pulled into the parking lot he said, "So this is what witness protection looks like."

Heather has a restraining order against him in Orlando, but he has said to her that it doesn't apply in Tallahassee. He has been terrorizing her and her friends. He tells her friends that he thinks he and Heather are going to be together forever.

In high school he was not her boyfriend, they were just friends. His mother told me that when Heather left for college he was despondent and depressed for months he missed her so much. (Of course at the time I was like, "awwww".) He finally saved his own money and moved to Orlando to be with her. They were friends until early 2009 when finally they became boyfriend/girlfriend.

They had a tumultuous relationship with violence and frequent calls to 911. They did the drugs together. (In this last phone call she referred to them as "Blues" (???).)

He currently has to go to court for a concealed weapon charge. I don't know what the weapon was. She said he is going to Tallahassee this weekend and she is mad she has to stay in her apartment.

She ASKED me for my advice. I told her - her SAFETY is #1 importance. I said keep herself safe until eventually he moves on to someone/something else. She thanked me for my advice. (I thank Al-Anon b/c I am finding when I don't give unsolicited advice and only give advice when specifically asked, I GET THANKED!!! I used to give advice freely without being asked and got SHUT DOWN!!! Amazing...)

Anyway, needless to say I am worried for her safety. The time when I said "awwww" in reaction to his actions, has now turned into warning/danger signs.

I don't think there is anything I can do but pray.

She also has some worrisome things going on with her Dad, but I'm not writing about him on this blog. I just want to note it.

On a good note, Heather said she wants to try to come out to see us in the next couple weeks :) I'm not going to bank on it, but my gosh do I miss her!

She sounds good :)

I tell myself, "God is in control."